By Sham Ali
(Celebrating 42nd Anniversary – Match #1182):- It is 1:55pm and we left Lido beach cricket ground and are blazing through the rain. At 1:56pm at Lido Beach cricket ground, hell broke loose and the devil was running rampant, where will the next pint (points) suck of blood comes from. All of it has been diluted in water, and you know that devil does not like water. Is there something that is fundamentally wrong about New York cricket that people engaged in indiscipline, fabrications, and plain thievery as if it comes with the territory or is that just a small group?
Well, you can draw your own conclusions about the match between Cosmos and American Cricket Society on a rain drenched Sunday at Lido Beach cricket ground. A report was filed by the Umpire. It is an absolute disgrace to call the report an umpire’s report. It was marred with falsity and fabrications that it does not even worth this space or the paper it is printed on. If the Umpire is qualified by the reputable United States of America Cricket Umpires Association (USACUA), then the USACUA may need to take a new look at their training curriculum, and perhaps add a few lessons on the word ‘impartial ‘the word that defines an umpire, and what kind of information must be in an umpire’s report.
Here is a clip of what the Umpire wrote “I arrived there at the ground at 12:05 pm. I saw Mr Zamin and a few players busy with the covering of the pitch. About 12:50 team Cosmos arrived.” OH Laad Gaad, if the intent was to falsity the report, at least get the time frame within reason. I shook the Umpire hand at 12:30. The very first sentence in the umpire’s report was blatantly false, and that was verified in our response to the league. It set the stage for the thievery comedy. Here is how it played out. When we got there at about 12:29 (that time just burned the umpire’s report), one guy (not 2 or a few) , no need to referenced the name so as to keep this space clean, so we will call him Exhibit 1. Exhibit 1 was taking out equipment and plastic from the storage container, while his other players were in a vehicle, in the parking lot, enjoying some ‘refreshing drinks’. At that time a parks department truck pulled up and gave Exhibit 1 a broom (there is another ‘character’ that carries a broom).
Three of us (Cosmos boys) went to look at the wicket at about 12:35 or so. The wicket was wet/soft maybe from overnight or morning rain with water lodged on both ends. My finger went down about an inch on the wicket. It was heavy overcast conditions during which time Exhibit 1 was doing whatever he was doing to the wicket. Perhaps hoping that a postmortem will revive the dead. It started to rain shortly thereafter, and got heavier and continued nonstop. When we left at 1:55pm it was raining heavily.
The Umpire said “I arrived there at the ground at 12:05 pm. I saw Mr Zamin and a few players busy with the covering of the pitch. Patently false. Oh S+@#% (don’t mek me name all-colloa-clat now). Shucks man, is so alyu like fo xxx (fill in the x). It was raining at 12:45, and that was the time two men were pulling the covers onto the ground (so ump, your 12:05 time is fabricated) and the other five players were comfortably sheltered in a vehicle in the parking lot still having something ‘refreshing’ to drink.
Now, that concocted story in the report, was probably directed by someone who intended to engage in this thievery to claim the game, it set the stage for the rest of the ‘so-called’ report. Take a read, “I waited the until 2:30 by the ACS was picking up the covers and told me to make sure that the rain was not falling any more and the pitch was hard for the game. “ Wow! The Umpire and the hosts are in conversation now, and hosts is trying to sell that prepackaged feces to the world. Unbelievable. The pitch was soft at 12:35, but now they claim that it got hard after it was soaked again, and as the rain continue to fall nonstop. Remember, the Umpire said that we arrived at 12:40. So the lies were flowing. Check the pics if you want evidence.
Here is a piece of profanity in another color ‘and TOLD me to make sure”. So is it a case where the umpire cannot decipher for himself, that someone had to instruct him and plant that phrase in his head? But that pattern is equivalent to a serpent in the grass waiting for the right moment to strike, like just after we left Lido beach at 1:55pm. They made up that 2:30 story because they were pissed watching the rain falling all by themselves. And speaking about grass, nothing was mentioned about the outfield conditions during an hour of steady rain. Well, that was ‘bone dry like the wicket’. The entire outfield was covered in plastic, yea right! You see the grass is waterproof and in some areas Exhibit 1 was probably drying it up, grass by grass, to get it in PERFECT playing conditions after we left.
We do not know what happened after 1:55pm, and we do not care! Smoke that! The ducks were out looking for the serpent in the grass. If you have a boat, you can play. What we did say amongst ourselves before we left is that “you want to see some rotten behavior, watch as soon as we leave they will say that the rain stopped and that the game could have been played. Hallelujah! So said, so done.
The unfortunate flaws in their story were clear. This wasn’t a marginal situation of not wanting to play. No play was possible and now this attempt at thievery. You cannot trust them with milk at a baby’s party. Here is a gut punch. One of the host’s players called us while we were driving over the bridge at 12:18, to see if quote “you guys still coming, no cricket kyan play hay today” and they all knew that. They said so at 12:18pm, at 1:55pm as well as, on Sunday night, and on Monday. The conditions were bad!
The Umpire or the hosts never took the initiative to engage us in any substantive discussion about the rain drenched conditions, not at 12:30, not at 1pm, not at 1:30pm, not at 1:50pm. Every initiative was taken by Cosmos when we saw that it was a total waste of time to stay there and watch the rain fall. If Exhibit 1 wants to spend his weekends at the cricket ground and engage in this kind of devious behavior, that is his business, other people have a life.
Nothing of substance came from the Umpire when I ask him about the conditions at 12:30. I went again at 1:40 or so, he wasn’t there. Only two vehicles were there and both were Cosmos boys. That should indicate that they left the ground because they also knew that weather was bad. They went to buy more ‘refreshing drinks‘.
They came back shortly and I went to the vehicle in which he was sitting with some of the hosts players. I said to him “what are we doing ump, there is no point waiting around here anymore”, he gave me a by-the-way-reply, he said, “they (pointing to the direction of Exhibit 1 car parked across by the containers) said 2:15 -2:30” I said to the Umpire that “ who is he, it wouldn’t make difference, this is a conditions call and is your decision to make, not them”, he didn’t answer. I then said to him that “there is no point waiting around here anymore, it’s been raining for almost an hour and it is coming down harder now” he didn’t respond. One of the boys in the car said “yea, nothing happening hay today, we leaving just now too”.
I then said to him that we are leaving. He did not answer. I asked him how much is the fee, he said $85. I paid him and we left at 1:55 with the rain still coming down.
So whose slippery ploy was this? That within minutes of us leaving the hosts had the audacity to claim the game. Well, the Umpire attempted to change his fabricated report three days later, perhaps he found Jesus after he saw the Cosmos report. Praise the Lord!. He allegedly claim that he was tired when he wrote the first report. Yea skites! We have a floating bridge in Guyana to sell you, by the time you reach to the other end of the bridge, you driving book will expire. The Umpire may have gotten some ‘coaching’. As for the hosts report, that is raw sewerage, like everything else that comes from that direction.
Cosmos had a full team, the hosts had seven players (Exhibit 1 said that need only 7 players to beat us. Omg, that is sooo true. At least Exhibit 1 is consistent in talking down to and berate the young cricketers, maybe that is his enjoyment and therapy for whatever shortcomings there may be. It was also a convenient distraction that the collection box was maybe a bit low that week, but that is neither here nor there, and not anyone’s business. Sadly, this kind of oversized testicular prowess is nothing more than raw barefacedness and pure arrogance. This is not a one-off occurrence; they are usually ingrained in that feeling of crass indispensability. It is incredible to comprehend that Exhibit 1 someone on the hosts team would stoop so low to concoct such ploy while hiding and peeping from behind the Umpire report, just to win a cricket match, in order to affect the standings on the points table, and selling their souls in the process to further a quest for a little prize money, that is already spent, and grease the ego in the process.
Seriously, are these people taking these points or trophies to the grave or will they live forever? After we witnessed the conditions of the pitch and ground, and then read a totally fabricated report from both sides. One is inclined to ask how low would some go to claim a cricket match (a Sunday afternoon pastime). But then the answer came in biblical notes from one of the boys, that some would even berate God for it. That took the cake, bro, that took the cake skurs!
Incidentally, the league, well intended, generously offered an incentive to create some added interest in the competition, not for you to choke each other over it. It is quite interesting though how these petty money quest often have a few common denominators, be it a cricket field, an tour, or a cricket competition. But what is sad and even more disconcerting is to see how some ‘grown-ass’ men, who probably pee when they cough, and some who pretend that they are holier-than-thou, sell their soul, if they have one, and do it so shamelessly as if it is written in the Holy Book. It is foolish to think that people will not despise the kind of deviousness which occurred at Lido Beach cricket ground last Sunday; lied about the conditions, falsity the report, and then claim the game. It is simply atrocious, and to claim otherwise is shameful.
Sadly, it appears that the younger players on that team, and a young captain are simply numbers. There appears to be no respect for their character and integrity by dragging and aligning them with this kind of behavior that served a selfish interest. This claim-of-the-game seems to be an underhand work, and these young players will be stained by it forever, and have it thrown in their faces every time a similar situation occurs, and a young captain, Amaranth Persaud, a quiet and decent young man who I have known for a long time since he was a youth cricketer, is perhaps being used as a scapegoat in that outfit. Interestingly, when the rain was coming down heavily, Cosmos vice captain went over to him sitting in his car at about 1:45pm to inquire, he pointed and said to go and ask him (Exhibit 1). Clearly, he, the captain, has no say. No one cares to hear what Exhibit 1 has to say, period. He is irrelevant. But then he tries to claim relevance through these slippery actions, and what a way to do it. It is hard to fathom that these young players, based on what I heard from them on Sunday with regards to the game, that they had no hand in that cookie jar, and it would be unkind to label them as such.
Memories are fresh from the international scene where a young innocent and talented Pakistani fast bowler, M. A, was lured into deceitful behavior by his seniors, for a few dollars, and he suffered the consequences dearly. At any level of the game, the expectations are that the younger players must be guided in doing the right thing and to engage in fair-play at all times, some will learn and some won’t, but what we saw last Sunday by those who claim prominence for cheap popularity is quite nauseating.
Take the points, take 2, 3 10, or a full bag, or belly full if that will help win a championship and a couple of dollars. If you want the wicket to dry, SOAK IT. We do not want any. The only thing that we want is all-the-rain-that-fell on the ground, period. Here is an interesting thought though. It was Cosmos that caused the rain to fall. You see, it started when we arrived at the ground and they claimed that it stopped when we left the ground. Don’t laugh. They probably got away with bullying others in the past, NOT COSMOS!
In all earnest, this is a dastardly act by any measure, to claim a game that was not possible in the morning, noon or night. It implies a total disrespect (some stripes don’t change) for the sport itself, the NYNCL officials in more ways than one, and the teams that earn their points FAIRLY. Maybe this is deliberately designed to cause friction in the league, and a vile attempt to dismantle it. The NYNCL needs to take a serious look at its priorities and the teams that will serve its long-term objectives and the sport for the better.
This claim of this game, under those conditions, is without question the most venomous, shameless, and distasteful action ever taken by a team. There was nothing principled about it, absolutely none. This was just pure, raw wickedness. There was no point waiting around unless you had a wicked motive and that motive revealed itself. Cosmos, after playing one thousand, one hundred and eighty-two games in their long history, and will take it to 1183, have never allowed themselves to sink so low and never will. Cosmos left at 1:55pm. If Exhibit 1 wants to sit there and watch the grass grows, more power. It was a great day for ducks, and they were out in flocks. Watch your tongue!
PS. Here is a ploy learned from the folks at Lido. If you want free points, perform these steps.
- If the wicket is wet.
- Let it get wet a little more.
- Then cover it.
- Let the rain fall for an hour or so.
- Wait for the opposition to leave.
- Pick the covers up.
- Claim wicket was dry skites.
- Instruct the Umpire to report that.
- Then claim the game, if that makes you happy.
- Most important. Do not follow this method if you want to keep your integrity intact.
